8 Months Out

Hello friends and dear readers. It's been a while since I have posted anything about my recovery, but I can't help slow down the life that is flying by before my eyes. It's been 8 months since I have had the bone marrow transplant. That's 240 days! It doesn't even feel like it even though it seems like ages ago. Since my last update, a lot has changed. I went back to work in February and have been working part time and it made me feel normal again. Having an agenda, making plans. My days are longer, more productive, less lazy. I work as a pharmacy technician and have been doing this for over 6 years now. It's a very easy job for me since I sit at a computer and know how to do my job well. So in other words, stress-free. Usually. That is what is important for recovery as well as sleep. I was on a pill so that I wouldn't bleed since I got sick. I was taking it because my platelets were constantly low and they didn't want me to have my period and lose extra blood (I'm anemic, I need all the blood I can get lol). And so I didn't have a normal period for about a year and a half. After transplant, my platelets were the first to go up. Once they were over 130k they told me I can stop the medication. I still didn't get my period for about a month and a half and I was already kind of worried. Doctors said after chemo there is a chance of not having your period come back. Well guess what, it started. Better late then never, but it felt sooooo good because hey, it was another thing that made me feel normal. Some people complain about their periods, but take it away from them unwillingly and they will never complain again. You don't know what you have till it is gone... It doesn't mean I am fertile and gonna have children for sure, but we are praying for God's will. We believe that with him, all things are possible. Anyways, I was taking it easy with exercise because my heart would hurt any time I did any hard physical activity like jogging or a workout. However, at the beginning of march I noticed my blood finally started going up on it's own!! The last transfusion that I received was on 2/20/2016. that's 6 weeks ago. That's the longest it's ever been since I got diagnosed! I am so excited. My blood the first week was 6.5, the next was 7.5, then 8.3. Last Monday when they check, it was 9.7! The average is 12-16 so it is almost there. As soon as I saw it started going up, I got myself a gym membership and I have been able to work out like a normal person (I still take it easy). But I am capable, that's the point. I am also trying to lose some weight that I gained over the months and trying to get some muscles back. The steroids, chemo, water overloading, stress, and pills did a toll on me.  And it's such a relief that things are going back to the way they should. The way we all expect our lives to be before something happens and all of the sudden your sick and have to make life changing decisions. My platelets are already at 200, and my white cells started to go up as well. My iron should be 11-307 (average) and it was 1485 because of all of the transfusions. I have been on a medication exjade. It wasn't helping all that much. I started drinking a goat whey smoothie every morning with Thorne Basic Detox Nutrients and within weeks my iron has dropped down to 1072, Praise God!!  That's my biggest issue right now. Even mild iron overload can increase the risk of liver disease, cirrhosis, cancer, heart failure and heart attack, diabetes, osteoporosis, premature death. It can accelerate Alzheimer, early-onset Parkinson, huntingtons, epilepsy and multiple sclerosis. Obviously all of these are scary and are like nails on a chalk board when you hear them. That's why I am praying and hoping the iron will drop fast. All my other results look really good. They are all in the normal range, so that's awesome. My brothers cell have taken over mostly and are doing what they need to. As for whats new with me, we are in the process of buying the house we are renting right now. It fell in our lap and I just see it as God's blessing. We don't have to move anywhere and now we will be paying rent back into our own pocket. So that's exciting. Also my husband sold my crossfire and got me a new car, so that has also been the highlight of my month. All in all, this is just worldly materials, in the end they don't matter. Objects don't last, neither does this life. Cherish your life, your loved ones, your health. Be thankful every day. Be blessed :)
xoxo

Recovery

Hello lovely readers.
As the days go by, my recovery is getting better and the whole transplant is less of a reality and more of a blurry horrific memory. Nightmares seem so long when your having them, but when you wake up and realize it was only a dream there is relief, peace, and all that is left is a memory. That is how I feel. I am in this awful dream and I am on the verge of waking up. Soon this will all be nothing more than a conversation on my tongue. There will be no more appointments, no worry, no more needles! No more infusion and transfusions, no more pain. All the physical changes will pass and everything will be back to normal. The confidence and security, the strength and the energy. Honesty the only way I got through all this is from prayers. How is it that so much damage can happen to a person and they are still positive? Well God gives us hope and faith. Of course I haven't shared everything that I went through or am going through with the whole world but there is more than whats visible to the eye. More personal things. Only people who have gone through things like this can understand the things that cloud my mind. But I wanna say thank you for the prayers. Every day is getting easier, and I believe I will be back to normal in no time! The transplant is in the past, thats already a big step. Some people can't even find a donor for years. I had mine within the first 3 weeks of being diagnosed.  My brother was a donor for a reason, and that alone is another story. Where God brought him today, after the transplant. It was all for a reason, and that was for the blessing of his soul. I can see how this was all part of God's plan and he knew it would lay out this way. He knows best.
As this is a new chapter in my life, I can start making plans. Plans with my husband, plans for my future. I can actually leave town now! I don't need to get a blood test done every other day now like I did for so many months before. Now it is just once a week and I have been needing blood every 2-3 weeks. Before it was weekly. I am also tapering off of my medications slowly. Thank God. I started taking vitamins also. I have been trying to stay active and I am praying that I will be able to exercise soon. Like jogging!! Oh boy. I haven't been jogging since September 2014. My body just wouldn't allow. I can barely make it up the stairs without my heart beating crazy. So I am praying for that to come quickly. I will probably have tears of joy when I will finally feel sore muscles LOL. It's the little things. I am eating and drinking everything I want, no more gluten free! No more restrictions. It's the best feeling. I am sorry to those who don't have this luxury. I really am. My heart aches for the sick. Especially for those with lifelong health or body issues. It's just devastating. But it is a good reminder when I think about the freedom in heaven one day. No pain, no problems, just perfection.
This whole journey has taught me so much. I can see how God has poured so many new friends into my life. And the ones that were there also were brought closer to me. And he has showed me other types of people and friends that weren't really friends. I still have to be thankful. Take everything away from someone and what is left of them? I always loved that statement. The best thing we can invest in is ourselves. People want to surround themselves with people that make them feel good. People that are kind, don't gossip, aren't arrogant or rude. People who are genuine and actually care. I can always see through people who are real and are not real. But God lets his light shine on us for a reason so that we can be a good example. Proverbs says, "As iron sharpens iron, so should we sharpen the minds of others." I love this. I love friends that mold me to be better. I encourage you all, be the light. Anyways, just wanted to give a little update, yes I am doing well, and everything is still going very well. Love you all, and thank you for the prayers. xoxo

Welcome to New York

They say that New York is the city of lights. I would have to agree that this is a very busy city that is full of life. I was there for 3 days back in 2014 and I really loved it. Yes its intimidating with all of the taxis, subways, and busy streets but we were able to get around. We did however make it to the airport late so Julie and I missed our flight and had to stay an extra day which was a blessing in disguise. Yes some of the places there aren't so luxurious and nice but I am sure it is expensive to live in a place such as this. We stayed at the Wall street Inn and we really like how cute and clean it was. There was even a super cute room with breakfast that was offered in the morning. It was april so it was chilly but it was still nice to get around and get some fresh air. We did some shopping, ate some good pizza, and did a lot of walking. We got to know the subway station, the famous streets, and the populated attractions.  Here are some picture, lets start off with some of the famous Brooklyn Bridge.





Central Park:




Empire state building




 Grand Central Station


 Times Square

Hope you enjoyed my post!

Travels to the Caribbean

One of the things that I love most os to travel. I started traveling when I was 17 and am so grateful that I was able to make those memories. The best things in life are the things that are free, like seeing the beauty of God and the things that he has created. I love blogging because I can write things down that I can come back to later to read or look at. I can also add pictures that help tell the story. I want to share some of the places I went to in some posts. This post will be on the trip I took to St. Martin in April 2014. This was a very fun trip. I went with 3 of my friends Zhanna, Julie, and Marina. The island is fairly small, around 33 square miles, and is divided into two parts. A dutch and a french side. This was very interesting because its one island and the two sides have a lot of differences including language and currency. Of course it is all very beautiful but I really liked the beaches. I really like mullet bay, Friars Bay and a couple of beaches on the french side. Here are some pictures of the beautiful beaches









These next pictures are of the island Anguilla. We took a ferry over to this also small island. It is 16 miles long and 3 miles long. it is a very beautiful island and has amazing beaches. Just like St. Martin the island is poor and messy looking but the people are very friendly. The picture below is from the best beach I have been to. It is called Shoal Bay and it was rated as one of the top beaches in the world a few years back. It is truly amazing. The sand is white, the water is warm, no waves, and the weather was just perfect. 





 This picture was taken outside of our hotel:















 Last day in Paradise






Hope you enjoyed the photos!
xoxo

The big day, Day 100!

Hello everyone!
yes, can you believe it is day 100 already? I am so excited that everything has been so good so far and I pray it will stay that way. Many have been asking how I have been doing, I know I haven't wrote a blog in a while because my labs were up and down and I wanted to wait until I hit today. So much has happened also, we moved from Portland to Vancouver into a house right after transplant. So that kept me busy for some time while I was unpacking and decorating. We also got a chihuahua puppy and names him louie, he's the sweetest. The commute is much easier for my mom since she lives in Vancouver and she has been my caregiver while Yan is at work. Yans work office also moved to Vancouver so it all worked out for the best, thank God. I won't be required to have a caregiver 24-7 starting today so I can finally be on my own! I can drive now, eat whatever I want, and start taking vitamins I wasn't allowed to before. They say severe GVHD (Graf vs Host disease) usually occurs in the first 30-60 days. Thank God I passed that, but I am not in the clear yet. I can still develop acute GVHD from now to the rest of my life I believe? They said I can't ever get sunburnt and have to wear spf 30 for the rest of my life. I love the sun and I love to tan so that sucks, but the bright side is that I will help prevent skin cancer since many people don't realize the damage a little sun can do. We really need a vacation and doctors said we can go as soon as 6 months after transplant, but the further away the more safe it is for me.
Since I've been home from transplant I have been going back to OHSU 2 times a week. I would be there for about 2.5-6 hours at a time depending what I needed done. Every time I would need magnesium because the cyclosporin made it drop. I would also still need a unit of blood every week. Every time I met the doctors my responses were the same: I feel great, no nausea, vomiting, diarrhea, constipation, fatigue or weakness. These are the side affects people have after transplant. Thank God I did not have any. The power of prayer. So thank you to those who prayed for me. Doctors always said I was doing great.
I had a third bone marrow biopsy done at the end of October. It was the most painful one so far. Of course Yanik was there with me holding my hand while I almost broke his lol. I was sore for a few days but I am back to normal now. The results showed that my body is slowly producing cells and 90% of them are donor cells (my brothers) and 10% mine and that is great but they want more than 90 so they might change up some of my meds or taper me off some faster. I have been on a lot of antibiotics and that slowed the process a little. Also my white blood kept going up and down and so I would get the neupogen shot. Last time I got it the same time as I got the pneumonia vaccine and I seriously thought I was gonna have a heart attack and die in my sleep lol. Well its not really funny, but when I think about it I know thats probably very unlikely. Just with every heart beat I felt pain as if it was beating so hard and I couldn't move my left arm and shoulder for 2 days, and the other shot made all my bones hurt especially my hips. Lets just say I needed to take strong pain meds to sleep.
Aside from that I didn't have too much pain until this week. I had my line in my chest removed! So excited I wont have those weird eyes looking at it in public haha. Well also I can take a bath now. For the last year I have been taking showers anyways. And I take them sitting down since it saves energy which I don't always have. The removal of the port didn't take 20 min like usual, no it took a whole hour. Since Im young and my body heals fast, it built a lot of tissue around the port so the doctor couldn't pull it out. Lots of pulling and tugging left some bruising and a very tender chest. Thank God they got it out and now it is just healing. The hole is smaller than dime size so I'm hoping for very minimal scarring.
I am still taking most of the same meds but will be tapering down eventually. Some of the size effects are annoying and make me feel self-conscious at times, but I have so much more to be thankful for, like my life. I transition to Kaiser this week so I will be going there now instead and only once a week. Any treatments I will need will have to be done through a needle in the arm again. Can't say I've missed it.. I actually have not been back to church yet, I almost did but it didn't work out. I think I will be going back this week or next as soon as I get an okay from my doctor. I really miss it!
As for now, we are just waiting for full restoration and healing. I am healed like God said, and I do get to testify, now its just a matter of time while he is still doing his work.
Love you all, be blessed!

Day 21 after transplant- I AM HOME

Hello everyone, yes I got released from OHSU on day 17,  a few days ago and I have just been soaking it in. My counts went up from 470 to 1,800 over night and so the doctor was like okay missy, your out of here lol. Since I was doing so good when I was discharged my appointments were switched from every day to twice a week. Woohoo! It was the best feeling even though I knew the battle wasn't over. A part of me didn't want to leave because I wasn't fully healed yet. God said there will be a miracle and people will be amazed but I realized that God is still still doing his work. I will be fully restored and I believe with all of my heart that God is with me and this is still part of the plan. I do not know what will happen or how but I trust him completely that whatever happens, he is in charge and holds the world in his hands. My total healing will come and I believe I will testify, it's just a matter of time while he works on me, my family and friends, and others who have been touched by my story. I am thankful for the new friends I made there with the cna's and nurses and you can see they were excited for me to be going home. When I was leaving my heart hurt for the ones that had to stay behind in the hospital. Especially the ones who wouldn't ever walk out of there. Sickness can rob a person of everything, but to us believers it can't rob us of our faith if our roots are planted in deep. It can't rob us of salvation and hope, and it defiantly cant change that fact that HE who is in us is stronger than he who is of this world.
It's interesting how we humans think this and that and then we are humbled because God is like, no, I'm not done yet. Or he does things in a way we don't expect, he works in mysterious ways. The best thing you can do is say, LORD, I trust and believe in you, and thank him for everything. When I got home I was very glad to have my freedom. Sleeping on your own bed at night is something people shouldn't take for granted. A roof over your head is a wish some people can only dream of. I slept so good at night :) And the next day was just as great, time started to pass at a more steady rate, I got to cook and do easy cleaning. My mom has been with me while Yanik is at work and so she is my caregiver for now. I had my first check up yesterday, my white blood count went down to 1,000 but I got another shot to help increase this number. I got a unit of red blood cells and platelets since my body hasn't started producing them yet. My magnesium is kinda always low because of the cyclosporin but thats okay. My hands and my feet are very sensitive after the chemo. My feet hurt more, and what I mean is that when I bend my feet like to squat or bend them they hurt pretty badly. It's a weird sensitive pain I can't really describe. Feels like the top layer is not there and they are dry. So even when I was walking today the numbing effect had me back on a chair in a matter of seconds. But it can be so much worse, I can't complain. I have so much to be thankful for, I am alive.
And I can prove this, because my best friend Krestina has been with me this week and she got sick the other day in my bed. Her heart kept stopping, she kept dying. Her brain tells her to wake up, and she gasps in a deep breath finally after not breathing for up to 15 seconds and her body starts to seize and shake and all we can do is hold and shake her and make sure she wakes up, breaths, and stays awake and doesn't go unconscious. When I think of suffering, I think of her. I mean how is my sickness suffering? I'm not in constant pain, I can eat whatever I want, I can sleep and still enjoy life. I will be fully healed and restored. She has been battling these attacks for 3 years! Mayo clinic sent her home and told her she had 3 weeks to live. Well look how big our God is. He is the one who decides that. Not people who are made by him. With him the impossible is possible. But please keep her in your prayers, she needs this healing, but it's in Gods hands and he is doing his work. So please keep us both in your prayers, so that our faith wont be shaken, and for God to do his work through us. As best friends, we are here to pick each other up as we go through the same battles in life and I know that God will be using us both after we finish drinking from this cup of suffering. Then he will put everything into place like he promised. I see it as a puzzle, he will bless us both in every way. This includes our health, beauty, having children even when doctors say otherwise, great blessings and the rewards he said are waiting for us. Love you all, thank you for reading.
xoxo

Day 22, +16 after transplant

Hello friends.!
I am happy to say that I can say that I am still doing very well. No matter what, I am on the road to recovery and God is with me. I am in his hands and he is carrying me. Since the day that I have been here, he has helped and protected me. Compared to most of the patients on this floor, I am just cruizing it, waiting for Gods work to be done. As I have mentioned in the beginning, chemo has barely had an effect on me. My best friend Krestina surprised me yesterday and walked into my hospital room in comfy clothes holding a care package. Of course I was in shock to see her, she drove for over 3 days with her husband just to see me! And she's the sick one I mentioned before, I mean her doctors told her not to go anywhere but she was like nu-uh, I have to see my reggie. We had a blast, she made the day fly by and she will be with me for the next few days. I am very, very happy she is here with me.
Well here is some more good news! My white blood count has been slowly going up. This means my immune system is getting stronger. On my previous post it has gone up to 130. Well then the next day it stayed the same, it didn't go up or down, and then yesterday it was at 220. Today my doctor called me a super cruiser and said my counts are at 470. Well he said they are at 700 but out of the good cells they look at its about 470. I just need a little more, they are saying I might be out of here tomorrow, Sunday the latest! Oh I can't wait. But I will not forget Gods promise, he will not be late, he will fully restore me. I am so thirsty for that full restoration, for that freedom. Health is so important friends, take care of your bodies.
Today they wanna slowly start taking me off the iv medications that go into my body through the port and start giving me oral meds so that when I leave I can just be taking oral tabs. The fight might just be over soon. For those who do not know what aplastic anemia is, its a condition where there is a deficiency of all types of blood cells caused by failure of bone marrow development. Doctors don't always know how it develops as it can be different for many people. It can leave you fatigued and with higher risk of infections and uncontrolled bleeding. Symptoms can include:
  • Fatigue
  • Shortness of breath with exertion
  • Rapid or irregular heart rate
  • Pale skin
  • Frequent or prolonged infections
  • Unexplained or easy bruising
  • Nosebleeds and bleeding gums
  • Prolonged bleeding from cuts
  • Skin rash
  • Dizziness
  • Headache
    • Aplastic anemia can become chronic, it can be very severe (as mine was) and can even be fatal. Krestina said she did research and saw that many people with aplastic anemia don't even make it through the chemo because it is so hard on the body. Patients with severe, chronic aplastic anemia that does not respond to available treatments have a 80% chance of dying within 18-24 moths. On top of that, people with this condition are at higher than average risk for developing leukemia. As you all can see now, this isn't just a walk in the park but this is a scary condition. And God has been with me the whole time!!! His hands have been holding me. Even when my counts were super low, when I didn't have many platelets or red blood in my body, when I had no immune system, he was always with me. I am very blessed that I can even share my story and be so positive about it because I know that I will be okay. And you know what, I am thankful for it all. It hasn't been easy always mentally, but it could be so much worse. I just don't allow the enemy to give me thoughts that would be scary. Always keep a positive attitude about life's circumstances, as this can lead you out to a path that is better for the salvation of your soul.  Wanna say thank you all for praying, God hears prayers. Let me know if you would like me to keep you in your prayers, as I would love to. God bless you all!
    xoxo
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